Why Asking For Help Is Okay At University
- January 19, 2018
- George Moss
Students can be a stubborn lot. While there’s a lot to be learned from others during those three years of rigorous education and fun, often we’re more comfortable relying on ourselves.
In fact, it’s important not to get too ahead of yourself in the quest for independence. The overdraft, the hangover, the broken relationships, the pressure, the marks – they’re all prominent fears of the student world, and many of them evolve from a deep dread into a bitter reality. You can’t possibly thwart it all alone. In the end, you have to ask for help sooner or later.
For those of you nervous about speaking up, here are some reasons to bite the bullet.
Home comforts
Some see moving on to university as a one-way ticket to independence and freedom. Others feel it’s time to emerge from the chrysalis of the school timetable and complete their journey towards maturity. However, there’s a whole phase missing out of this growth spectrum: young adulthood.
The young adult is caught in an awkward spot somewhere between adolescence and adulthood. Suspended between worlds, there’s no shame in temporarily heading back to where it all started: the family home.
Give your folks a ring or even visit said home, because they certainly miss you and wish you’d stop by! After all, they got you this far, and they’ll help you along far further if you let them.
Changing goalposts
We all have goals, whether it’s getting that degree, finding a romantic partner, renting a flat or nabbing a dream internship. Of course the university experience, and indeed general life experience, almost always has other things in store.
The three or four years of university are a longer road than most might think, and you will encounter struggles along the way. This is not only okay but normal! Hard times pop up throughout life, and student life is no buffer for bouts of bad luck.
Of course, these problems don’t stop with adulthood; in fact, they’re likely to become harder to navigate. From marriage troubles to missing that promotion, grown humans don’t handle it all alone – so why should you?
Campus contacts
Finding help on campus can feel like fighting on the front lines, especially if your problems are uni-grown. Some students can wait up to four months to get seen by a counsellor, leaving many feeling left out in the cold.
Not all has gone to pot! You’ll find that, when a professional community isn’t yet readily available, regular folks can rally together to keep things ticking along. Lean on others, and when their turn comes to ask for help they’ll feel confident in doing so.
For example, some universities operate peer mentor schemes, meaning that higher-year students can sweep in and steer you away from the pitfalls of uni life. After all, not much trumps experience and brotherhood!
Dignity aside…
It’s totally understandable to want to handle things yourself, as you are indeed grown up and want some control. However, what’s important to remember is that entering adulthood is a gradual evolution and not just something that happens when you hit eighteen.
Ease yourself into independence. If you’re too hard on yourself right out of the gate, things won’t let up later down the line. Asking for help is a learning process! Be curious, ask questions and absorb others’ wisdom. After all, what else is university for?
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